Malkav
Jacks vergeudetes Leben
- Registriert
- 4. April 2004
- Beiträge
- 13.723
Ventrue Okay, guys, sit down. I suppose you're wondering why I've called you all here.
Toreador I should think so. I have an engagement in two hours that I simply MUST attend, and I don't want to be late.
Ventrue Yeah, yeah. Order. (banging noise) Well, I don't know about you guys, but my Progeny have been asking some rather....embarassing questions, and I--
Malkav Just tell them that when a Mummy and a Daddy love each other very much--
Ventrue Shut up, Malkav. Anyway, they want to know where we come from, why, how, the whole bit. I think it's time we had an answer for them.
silence
Brujah Well, what are you asking us for? WE don't fucking know.
Saulot LANGUAGE!
Brujah Sorry. I forgot what Region I was in!
Ventrue What about you, Ralph? You seem to have your nose in everything.
Nosferatu No, I am ... no longer called "Ralph." From this day forward, you shall call me: "Nosferatu."
silence
Ravnos I dunno, man. Ralph suits you.
Nosferatu No! I REFUSE to be stuck with that name.
Ventrue Leave him alone Ravnos.
Toreador Actually, while we're on the subject...
Ventrue What is it now?
Toreador I have taken the pseudonym, "Toreador."
more silence
Haqium You've never even SEEN a bull, let alone fight one, Norman.
Toreador LEAVE ME ALONE !!!
Ravnos I was gonna say something about "full of ..." Oh, never mind.
Ventrue SHALL we get back to business?
Lasombra I think "Nosferatu" sounds cool actually, Ralph.
Nosferatu And it's a lot easier to say when you can't retract your fangs.
Ventrue GENTLEMEN!
silence
Ventrue Okay, any ideas?
Tzimsce Uh ...
Ventrue Yes, Tzimisce?
Tzimsce Yas. Do you think it vaz a disease, perrrhaps?
Saulot Nnnnnnno ... I don't think so. I'd know about it by now if it was.
Malkav Ooo! Ooo! I've got an idea!
Ventrue (groan) What?
Malkav Ooo! Ooo! We're ALL ... aliens! Yeah! From the planet....Yuggoth!
Brujah Malkav?
Malkav Yeah?
Brujah Drop dead.
silence
Malkav Ain't it just TOO BAD you don't have Dominate?
Brujah REAL men don't NEED Dominate!
thud
Malkav Owww!
Ravnos Okay, I've got it.
Ventrue Yes?
Ravnos We're not REALLY vampires, we just THINK we are.
Ventrue Hmmm ... not bad ... but then the dumb ones will try to prove you wrong by taking a sunbake.
Lasombra SO? Weeds out the stupid ones, less of a population problem, less nosey Progeny asking silly questions.
Toreador Lasombra, you are a real sicko.
Lasombra Hey, am I my brother's keeper?
Tzimsce He has a valid point, frrriend.
Toreador Sickening creatures.
sniggering
Saulot Brother's keeper ... hey! That reminds me! You know those guys who wear the funny tea towels on their heads--
Haqium WATCH it, three-eyes.
Saulot Sorry. Anyway, they have this old story about this one guy who kills his brother and gets cursed, see....
Sutekh Cursssed, you sssay? Hmmm ... I like it!
Nosferatu Yeah, but if YOU say it, no-one will believe it.
Tremere I know! We did it by magick!
silence
Brujah Who the hell are you?
Saulot LANGUAGE!
Brujah Sorry.
Tremere To answer your question, I am Tremere, Arrogant Scheming Backstabbing Mage at your service!
Saulot Hang on, you're not supposed to be here until A.D. 1314!
Tremere So? Im....an....Oracle of Time. Yeah! That's it! I'll be when I want.
Ventrue A mortal, eh? Hey, Tremere!
Tremere Yeah?
Ventrue GET OUT.
Tremere Sure.
slam
Tremere (muffled) Damn. Must learn how to do that.
Ventrue Now, we might be onto something with this "curse" business. We haven't heard from Gangrel yet, and we need a female opinion at this juncture. What do you think, Gangrel?
silence
Ventrue Gangrel?
more silence
Ventrue Anybody seen Gangrel?
Ravnos Errr, actually, we've had a bit of a disagreement ...
Malkav Awww, doesn't Mummy wuv you any more?
Ravnos Suck off.
Malkav DOES she do it doggy-style?
biff
Ravnos Thank you, Brujah.
Brujah No prob, bro. Guy's a fucking wierdo anyway!
Saulot LANGUAGE!
Brujah Sorry.
Ventrue Okay, so what gives with this curse thing?
Saulot Well, they say that the first two sons of the first man had to give offerings to God. The first brother gave plants and stuff, and the second brother gave animal blood.
All Yeah! Alright! Sounds great! Cool!
Saulot So the older one -- Cain, I think -- killed Abel, the younger one, and was cursed by God for the very first murder.
Haqium innovative man, this Cain.
SUTEKH Sssso, we're desssscended from a pssssychopathic greengroccccer? How about we're desssscended from the MURDERED one, ssso that we are the CHOSSSSEN of God, the INHERITORSSSS of DIVINE POWER, the--
Malkav You REALLY have a God complex, don't you Sutekh? Tell me about your mother. Did she lock you in a cupboard? Or--
biff
Brujah Final warning, ya damn kook.
Saulot LANGUAGE!
biff
Saulot OW!
silence
Brujah Wow Saulot you heal quick!
Ventrue Sutekh, please, stop standing on your chair.
Tremere I like the "cursed by God" thing, actually.
Ventrue How did YOU get in here?
Tremere Correspondence. Don't you know ANYTHING? Hey, Saulot!
Saulot Yeah?
Tremere I JUST worked out where I've seen you before. Could I have a word with you outside? It won't take more than five minutes. Promise.
Saulot Sure. You seem like a decent enough fellow.
slam
Lasombra Wonder what he wants ... anyway ...
Toreador I think I prefer the older brother. He's a charming, regal figure who diligently sacrifices for his Lord, but is consumed by jealousy into a desperate act -- which he regrets later, of course -- but TOO LATE to avoid the harsh judgment of an UNCARING God, and is DOOMED to wander the earth, OUTCAST from his fellow man! Oh, the horror! Oh, the HUMANITY! Oh, the ANGST!
Brujah What's an "angst"?
Sutehk Oh, it'ssss a kind of a crosssss, but with a loopy thing on top. My guyssss love 'em.
Brujah Oh. I don't get it ...
Toreador Philistines.
scream from outside
Tzimsce Vat ze hell vas zat?
Nosferatu Sounded like Saulot. HEY! YOU GUYS SHUT UP OUT THERE!
door opens
Tremere Oh, sorry, uhhh ... Saulot says to say that, uhhh, he....had to leave -- real quick, like ... uhhh, but he was REAL happy about it, and, uhhh, he was glad he caught up with you guys again.
Nosferatu Is it me, or does he look kinda pale?
Ventrue Who cares? Getting back to this curse thing....
Lasombra So, are we his direct Progeny, then? 'Cos if so, how come we don't know where he is now?
Malkav Errr, he made us, then ran away. Really fast.
Ravnos No, no, no, he made some OTHER guys first, and then THEY made US ...
Toreador And he repented of The Horror He Had Unleashed Upon The Earth! And banished himself from the sight of ALL!
Malkav AND ran away really fast.
Toreador If you must.
Ventrue But how come we're all so different?
Toreador The Curse works in Mysterious Ways ...
Nosferatu Yeah! I used to be the most handsome man in the world ...
Ravnos Yeah, right.
Lasombra And I had a reflection!
Brujah Can I have been an intelligent philosopher?
Ravnos And Toreador used to have taste....
Malkav And I used to be insane!
silence
Ventrue I think we might be pushing our luck here.
Sutekh: Any BETTER ideassss?
Ventrue Well, let's put it to a vote, then. Magick?
Tremere Aye.
Ventrue That's one.
silence
Ventrue Okay, aliens from the planet Yuggoth?
Malkav Twenty-three.
Ventrue Your multiple personalities don't count, Malkav.
Malkav Awww ...
Ventrue The chosen son of God? ... Sutekh, Lasombra, Tzimisce. Any others?
Haqium Aye.
Ventrue Okay, that's four. Cursed children of a psychopathic green-grocer? ... That's four, plus myself, five.
groans
Lasombra Swinging the vote, you black-balling bureaucrat!
Ventrue If you don't like it, go and form your OWN group!
Lasombra Maybe I will.
Ventrue Okay, then, I charge all of you to disperse this data to your Progeny, and I'll have MY people send out memos in triplicate to YOUR people before the start of the next fiscal year. Meeting adjourned!
banging noise, general muttering and shuffling
Toreador Drinks anyone?
Malkav I think Tremere just ate.
TremereAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaahhhh....
Tzimsce Vy did you zrow him out ze window, Bruhah?
Brujah I dunno, man, just something I had to do ... sulking none of you understand me, anyway....
Haqium (whispered) Hey, Tremere!
Tremere What?
Haqium Saulot -- you did him in, didn't you? You snuffed him. Sucked him dry.
Tremere Uhhh ... yeah, I did.
silence Haqium What's it like?
Toreador I should think so. I have an engagement in two hours that I simply MUST attend, and I don't want to be late.
Ventrue Yeah, yeah. Order. (banging noise) Well, I don't know about you guys, but my Progeny have been asking some rather....embarassing questions, and I--
Malkav Just tell them that when a Mummy and a Daddy love each other very much--
Ventrue Shut up, Malkav. Anyway, they want to know where we come from, why, how, the whole bit. I think it's time we had an answer for them.
silence
Brujah Well, what are you asking us for? WE don't fucking know.
Saulot LANGUAGE!
Brujah Sorry. I forgot what Region I was in!
Ventrue What about you, Ralph? You seem to have your nose in everything.
Nosferatu No, I am ... no longer called "Ralph." From this day forward, you shall call me: "Nosferatu."
silence
Ravnos I dunno, man. Ralph suits you.
Nosferatu No! I REFUSE to be stuck with that name.
Ventrue Leave him alone Ravnos.
Toreador Actually, while we're on the subject...
Ventrue What is it now?
Toreador I have taken the pseudonym, "Toreador."
more silence
Haqium You've never even SEEN a bull, let alone fight one, Norman.
Toreador LEAVE ME ALONE !!!
Ravnos I was gonna say something about "full of ..." Oh, never mind.
Ventrue SHALL we get back to business?
Lasombra I think "Nosferatu" sounds cool actually, Ralph.
Nosferatu And it's a lot easier to say when you can't retract your fangs.
Ventrue GENTLEMEN!
silence
Ventrue Okay, any ideas?
Tzimsce Uh ...
Ventrue Yes, Tzimisce?
Tzimsce Yas. Do you think it vaz a disease, perrrhaps?
Saulot Nnnnnnno ... I don't think so. I'd know about it by now if it was.
Malkav Ooo! Ooo! I've got an idea!
Ventrue (groan) What?
Malkav Ooo! Ooo! We're ALL ... aliens! Yeah! From the planet....Yuggoth!
Brujah Malkav?
Malkav Yeah?
Brujah Drop dead.
silence
Malkav Ain't it just TOO BAD you don't have Dominate?
Brujah REAL men don't NEED Dominate!
thud
Malkav Owww!
Ravnos Okay, I've got it.
Ventrue Yes?
Ravnos We're not REALLY vampires, we just THINK we are.
Ventrue Hmmm ... not bad ... but then the dumb ones will try to prove you wrong by taking a sunbake.
Lasombra SO? Weeds out the stupid ones, less of a population problem, less nosey Progeny asking silly questions.
Toreador Lasombra, you are a real sicko.
Lasombra Hey, am I my brother's keeper?
Tzimsce He has a valid point, frrriend.
Toreador Sickening creatures.
sniggering
Saulot Brother's keeper ... hey! That reminds me! You know those guys who wear the funny tea towels on their heads--
Haqium WATCH it, three-eyes.
Saulot Sorry. Anyway, they have this old story about this one guy who kills his brother and gets cursed, see....
Sutekh Cursssed, you sssay? Hmmm ... I like it!
Nosferatu Yeah, but if YOU say it, no-one will believe it.
Tremere I know! We did it by magick!
silence
Brujah Who the hell are you?
Saulot LANGUAGE!
Brujah Sorry.
Tremere To answer your question, I am Tremere, Arrogant Scheming Backstabbing Mage at your service!
Saulot Hang on, you're not supposed to be here until A.D. 1314!
Tremere So? Im....an....Oracle of Time. Yeah! That's it! I'll be when I want.
Ventrue A mortal, eh? Hey, Tremere!
Tremere Yeah?
Ventrue GET OUT.
Tremere Sure.
slam
Tremere (muffled) Damn. Must learn how to do that.
Ventrue Now, we might be onto something with this "curse" business. We haven't heard from Gangrel yet, and we need a female opinion at this juncture. What do you think, Gangrel?
silence
Ventrue Gangrel?
more silence
Ventrue Anybody seen Gangrel?
Ravnos Errr, actually, we've had a bit of a disagreement ...
Malkav Awww, doesn't Mummy wuv you any more?
Ravnos Suck off.
Malkav DOES she do it doggy-style?
biff
Ravnos Thank you, Brujah.
Brujah No prob, bro. Guy's a fucking wierdo anyway!
Saulot LANGUAGE!
Brujah Sorry.
Ventrue Okay, so what gives with this curse thing?
Saulot Well, they say that the first two sons of the first man had to give offerings to God. The first brother gave plants and stuff, and the second brother gave animal blood.
All Yeah! Alright! Sounds great! Cool!
Saulot So the older one -- Cain, I think -- killed Abel, the younger one, and was cursed by God for the very first murder.
Haqium innovative man, this Cain.
SUTEKH Sssso, we're desssscended from a pssssychopathic greengroccccer? How about we're desssscended from the MURDERED one, ssso that we are the CHOSSSSEN of God, the INHERITORSSSS of DIVINE POWER, the--
Malkav You REALLY have a God complex, don't you Sutekh? Tell me about your mother. Did she lock you in a cupboard? Or--
biff
Brujah Final warning, ya damn kook.
Saulot LANGUAGE!
biff
Saulot OW!
silence
Brujah Wow Saulot you heal quick!
Ventrue Sutekh, please, stop standing on your chair.
Tremere I like the "cursed by God" thing, actually.
Ventrue How did YOU get in here?
Tremere Correspondence. Don't you know ANYTHING? Hey, Saulot!
Saulot Yeah?
Tremere I JUST worked out where I've seen you before. Could I have a word with you outside? It won't take more than five minutes. Promise.
Saulot Sure. You seem like a decent enough fellow.
slam
Lasombra Wonder what he wants ... anyway ...
Toreador I think I prefer the older brother. He's a charming, regal figure who diligently sacrifices for his Lord, but is consumed by jealousy into a desperate act -- which he regrets later, of course -- but TOO LATE to avoid the harsh judgment of an UNCARING God, and is DOOMED to wander the earth, OUTCAST from his fellow man! Oh, the horror! Oh, the HUMANITY! Oh, the ANGST!
Brujah What's an "angst"?
Sutehk Oh, it'ssss a kind of a crosssss, but with a loopy thing on top. My guyssss love 'em.
Brujah Oh. I don't get it ...
Toreador Philistines.
scream from outside
Tzimsce Vat ze hell vas zat?
Nosferatu Sounded like Saulot. HEY! YOU GUYS SHUT UP OUT THERE!
door opens
Tremere Oh, sorry, uhhh ... Saulot says to say that, uhhh, he....had to leave -- real quick, like ... uhhh, but he was REAL happy about it, and, uhhh, he was glad he caught up with you guys again.
Nosferatu Is it me, or does he look kinda pale?
Ventrue Who cares? Getting back to this curse thing....
Lasombra So, are we his direct Progeny, then? 'Cos if so, how come we don't know where he is now?
Malkav Errr, he made us, then ran away. Really fast.
Ravnos No, no, no, he made some OTHER guys first, and then THEY made US ...
Toreador And he repented of The Horror He Had Unleashed Upon The Earth! And banished himself from the sight of ALL!
Malkav AND ran away really fast.
Toreador If you must.
Ventrue But how come we're all so different?
Toreador The Curse works in Mysterious Ways ...
Nosferatu Yeah! I used to be the most handsome man in the world ...
Ravnos Yeah, right.
Lasombra And I had a reflection!
Brujah Can I have been an intelligent philosopher?
Ravnos And Toreador used to have taste....
Malkav And I used to be insane!
silence
Ventrue I think we might be pushing our luck here.
Sutekh: Any BETTER ideassss?
Ventrue Well, let's put it to a vote, then. Magick?
Tremere Aye.
Ventrue That's one.
silence
Ventrue Okay, aliens from the planet Yuggoth?
Malkav Twenty-three.
Ventrue Your multiple personalities don't count, Malkav.
Malkav Awww ...
Ventrue The chosen son of God? ... Sutekh, Lasombra, Tzimisce. Any others?
Haqium Aye.
Ventrue Okay, that's four. Cursed children of a psychopathic green-grocer? ... That's four, plus myself, five.
groans
Lasombra Swinging the vote, you black-balling bureaucrat!
Ventrue If you don't like it, go and form your OWN group!
Lasombra Maybe I will.
Ventrue Okay, then, I charge all of you to disperse this data to your Progeny, and I'll have MY people send out memos in triplicate to YOUR people before the start of the next fiscal year. Meeting adjourned!
banging noise, general muttering and shuffling
Toreador Drinks anyone?
Malkav I think Tremere just ate.
TremereAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaahhhh....
Tzimsce Vy did you zrow him out ze window, Bruhah?
Brujah I dunno, man, just something I had to do ... sulking none of you understand me, anyway....
Haqium (whispered) Hey, Tremere!
Tremere What?
Haqium Saulot -- you did him in, didn't you? You snuffed him. Sucked him dry.
Tremere Uhhh ... yeah, I did.
silence Haqium What's it like?
